traitor in the midst: a glimpse into the student publications' office

He had just set down the plaque, remaining engulfed in his conversation.

She picked it up, turned to the man at the desk, saying, "I think I'll just take it, under my shirt." He laughed. "On second thought, maybe I'll just hide it."

Glancing at the talking man, she walked to the yearbook-lined bookshelf with plaque in hand. Edging a few out slightly, she slipped the plaque behind the books. She grabbed a chair and sat next to the man at the desk, who pretended to be none-the-wiser, and they watched the ensuing calamity.

Within seconds, the talking man stopped talking. He walked to where he laid the plaque. "Where'd the Pacemaker go?" he inquired to the room.

This prompted a scour of the office -- rummaging through drawers, shuffling through papers, searching the darkroom -- all to no avail.

At one point, the once-talking man stood in front of the bookshelf, examining the yearbooks, but he failed to notice the few bulging books betraying the plaque's hiding place.

With each passing minute, the search became more frantic. Hands on his head, he sighed, clearly blaming himself for the lost plaque.

She began to rethink her actions. "Do you think we should tell him?" she asked the man at the desk. "No, no...," he reassured with a smirk.

And she walked out of the room.

magnetic ghosts

The ghost phenomenon may be nothing more than abnormal magnetic fields and low frequency sound waves, according to the program "Secret Life of Ghosts and Werewolves" that ran on KTWU last night.

While these scientific explanations may account for many of the occurrences reported, as they increase feelings of paranoia and stimulation, (as in being touched when not), and visual illusions, they do not account for themselves.

What causes abnormal magnetic fields and unusually low frequencies?

Ghosts, no doubt.

logic on Mass. Street

"I'm willing," a guy yelled from a passing truck. "Will you rape me?"

Taken by surprise, the three of them paused and stared as the truck continued down the street.

Looking from one to the other, he says, "I'm pretty sure that's just sex."

If you really want to make it,
you had best remember this:
If it isn't penetration
then it isn't worth a kiss.

"Penetration," Pedro the Lion

dubious conduct in lot 10

Everything seemed off all day.

But she couldn't figure out why.

She woke up in time to eat breakfast.

She made it to her classes on time and even did all the homework.

She didn't lose her keys or misplace her lip gloss.

She remembered where she parked.

Then it hit her: She left her bra in the parking lot.

escaped convict no more.

"Hey, do you think I can climb that wall?" he asked, contemplating his physical prowess.

Swinging her legs from the bench, tired from the hike, she glanced at the brick.

As he approached the wall, a noise drew their attention. A car pulled around from the side of the building, Shawnee County Sheriff clearly across its side. Seconds later, from the opposite side, an SUV appeared -- Oklahoma State Trooper.

For a minute, vehicle after vehicle poured from the structure, half a dozen from Oklahoma, even more from Shawnee County.

As the flow ceased, they turned to each other: What could draw so many sheriffs and state troopers, especially from Oklahoma?

Continuing their hike, they discussed possibilities, each one more outrageous than the last.

Minutes later, a straggling sheriff car came into view. She waved it down; she had to know.

"Because of all the abandoned buildings, we come out here to train our dogs."